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Brian
The Most Romantic High-Five Ever is the second episode of Brian & Claire: Volleylove and it is the second episode overall. Crim ends up convincing Claire to go on a double date with her, Reg, Roger and Brian, and Claire connects more with Brian. Tom's thicc bestie from childhood, Tracy Turnblad, shows up and rocks Link Larkin's heart. But Tracy's not the only one back in town... Plus, MDOSIEW ends up finding out a family secret. Episode PART 1/3 2 days have passed since I had met Brian and his friends... Me, Crim and Tom spent those 2 days by visiting all of River Peaks, and the memories we had of them. We were at the Renovated River Peaks Cafe, which was destroyed because of me... I know what you're thinking but after the accident Cathy Munsch decided to add Dick Burritos to the world and customizable Robot waiters. One came up to me. He was a hot guy. ROBOT: So what are you all having, you fine ladies? Especially you, Tom TOM: Aww thank you boo. Wanna fuck after your shift? ROBOT: I never stop working............... It gives a depressed face. TOM: ok, well obvi ur the one paying the check right? ROBOT: Dont tell the boss, hahaha... The robot goes away. CLAIRE: Wait how tf did you do that? TOM: While no one was looking I changed his settings CRIM: k CLAIRE: And am I the only one weirded out these robots powered by Jiggerita's Sock Factory are serving us? CRIM: Claire... Did you just forget all of the sudden that while we lived here we had to fight demons, ghosts, socks, wastes of oxygen *cough* ulises colina versace idfk *cough* and our own sex lives? TOM: accurate CLAIRE: dont u even say i-- TOM: especially claire Suddenly, a big fat thicc bitch walks into the diner. I didn't reckognize her, and neither did Crim, but Tom squeezed with excitement. He got up, hugged her and they both started jumping. TOM: YAS ICON TRACY TURNBLAD TRACY TURNBLAD: HI BITCH They stop jumping, and Tracy sits next to Tom. TOM: So guys, this is my childhood friend Tracy Turnblad. Tracy, meet Crim and Claire. CRIM: omg whats with that hair, giving a real 60s vibe TRACY: I just like really extravagant hair TOM: So, how's ur mom been doing after... what happened...? TRACY: Oh, she's been recovering CRIM: what happened to her mom? TOM: her mom is in a diabetic coma CRIM: wtf is that TOM: um idk, maybe she got into a diabetic coma bc donald trump is still our president, issa hasnt made a comeback and cupcakke hasnt released an album in like a week? PLUS HER MOM IS THICC SO CRIM: doesnt that make so much sense CLAIRE: wait we moved to river peaks when we were 10, and i dont remember seeing you here TRACY: oh thats because i moved out when i was like 8 and i accidentally ripped janet's weave at her birthday party TOM: LMAO JANET I CANT CRIM: '''um who the actual fuck is janet '''TOM: So, Tracy... what are you doing here in River Peaks? TRACY: Baltimore is fucking shit rn, and I saw on your Twitter that you were going on vacay here so like "Hey I havent seen Tom in like forever and this place is fucking busted how bow I stay here in River Peaks?" TOM: k well, were gonna have so much fun CRIM: speaking of fun CRIM: Hey, Claire, we should go on a double date CLAIRE: crim i only made out with u one time while i was drunk and i still regret it to this day CRIM: bullshit im a gr8 kisser, otherwise i wouldnt have two str8 fucks following me yep me and Crim made out ... CRIM: You can bring your boy toy, right? I mean, you guys havent texted or even like... whats that thing old people did? TOM: omg yeah what was it called that thing thats not texting but its talking but liek--- TRACY: omg right it was something like call or soemthing CLAIRE: u fucking bitches dont even remember calling? I was shooketh. CRIM: Cmon text ur baby, theyre probably bugging Brian to do the same thing to you CLAIRE: fine TRACY: Wait whos Brian? As Tom filled in the details for Tracy, I pulled out my phone. As I was messaging Brian, suddenly he texted me before I could hit send. BRIAN:'' ''sup BRIAN:'' ''so I know we only met each other in two days but CLAIRE: wait CLAIRE: did reg or roger invite you to a double date and asked you to invite me? BRIAN: pretty much... except both asked me to go on a double date with you CLAIRE: holy shit crim wasnt kidding about being followed by reg and roger CLAIRE: so when should we meet? BRIAN: Reg and Roger are telling me they are having dinner in a fancy restaurant at 8 pm CLAIRE: K see ya... Brian BRIAN: See ya... Claire So I returned to my house, to find MDOSIEW angry about something. MDOSIEW: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CLAIRE: '''tf is wrong mdosiew '''MDOSIEW: hey thats not my name MDOSIEW: i shall now be known forever as Cherry Chevapravatdumrong CLAIRE: K um: 1 - stop watching family guy; 2 - why are u angry MDOSIEW: I lost my emo earring CLAIRE: Want me to help you find it? MDOSIEW: fuck no ur a fucking bitch CLAIRE: ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm CLAIRE: k well, your choice bitch CLAIRE: byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee As I left the house, I heard MDOSIEW whispering to himself about his earring. Little did I know that earring would lead to the discovery of something terrible. But I CBA, time for my date! PART 2/3 Tracy and Tom were hanging out at Tom's old house. TRACY: omg this is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo kawaii TOM: ugh ikr TRACY: btw wheres mandy? why didnt she came with you guys? TOM: omg tracy... mandy has been through a lot here, i bet if she had to see this place again shed freak out TRACY: yeah true... TOM: you know its really good to see you again trace TRACY: aww ty, its really good to see you too. TOM: omg what would janet say if she saw you rn? TRACY: LMAO STOP Who the fuck is Janet? Anyways, someone rang the doorbell. TOM: ogm who tf is here Tom opens the door. It's Link. LINK: Um, hi. Did I mess up the house? TOM: Were you looking for Claire? Her house is in the front... But she's not there right now... so in a way you came to the right place. LINK: So you're here alone? TOM: Actually, my friend here Tracy--- TRACY: Hello I don't think we've me-- Tracy looks at Link and Link looks at Tracy.' WARNING: LOTS OF SEXUAL TENSION HERE'' '''LINK: Um... h-hi... T-Tracy... I-I'm Link. Larkin. TRACY: O-Oh hi... Link... TOM: oh em gee get a room you two LINK: Oh, um, well, I... I came here to invite you, Crim and Claire to the party... but the more the merrier right... Link winks at Tracy, and she blushes hard. TOM: you know theres a guest bedroom upstairs you two could fuck and so i couldnt bother you people id just watch daria or soemthing LINK: I mean... it's not like I don't want to...W AIT NO DONT GET T HE WRONG IMPRESSION F ME I JUST... I have Gundham waiting for me in the car... TOM: GUNDHAMS ALSO HERE OH FUCK YES Tom runs up to Gundham, gets on the frontseat and asks Gundham to drive. They both drive away. TRACY: that little bit-- LINK: welp... im here now am i not? Tracy giggles. giggles g i g g l e s GIGGLES G I G G L E S At a River Peaks fancy restaurant... ROGER: '''Oh the memories... Remember Crimmy, last time I came here I was abducted by a drag Ricky and Versace! '''CRIM: yeah. i remember. and my name is not fucking crimmy anymore. its CRIM. C R I M. REG: yeah but Crimmy is cuter--- Crim punches Reg in the balls. REG: OUCH lowkey missed you doing that tho Me and Brian finally arrive. He said I looked pretty when we drove here. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, I know. CRIM: CLAIRE THANK GOD Crim gets up from her seat and hugs me tight. Like she hasn't seen me for a very, very, very, very, very long time. CRIM: what took you guys so long, did you blow him in the car and he had to stop by the car station so you two could do doggy style CLAIRE: i wish BRIAN: wait what CLAIRE: hmm? We all sat down and started eating. I tried eating as classy as I could, and so did Brian and Crim, but at the middle of it Reg and Roger decided to have a hamburger eating contest. Crim just... sighed. It's like she didn't even want to live at that point. I could sympathize with her. I felt the same way... Until he saved the day. BRIAN: wait omg... claire He suddenly grabbed my hand. I felt horny. BRIAN: didnt u have that thing you needed to do at 8:15pm? CRIM: what the fuck is he talking about? CLAIRE: um... OH YEAH... its... its... Suddenly, a Fergie playlist starts playing and Crim gets up in her chair and starts singing along to the songs as me and Brian ran away from the restaurant. CLAIRE: Wow... thanks for that. Tho I feel bad we left Crim there. Little did I know, that in the restaurant... CRIM: ALL THE TIME I TURN AROUND ALWAYS BROTHAS GATHER ROUND ALWAYS LOOKING AT ME UP AND DOWN LOOKING AT MY RANDOM KID: PUSSY K anyways... CLAIRE: So... now what do we do? BRIAN: what do you wanna do? CLAIRE: well i mean... we could go for a walk Suddenly I get a phonecall from MDOSIEW. "I'll call him later, no biggie. It must be like nothing important so...". And at that point it was... MY HOUSE FLORA: Bitch stop screaming I can't listen to my hentai MDOSIEW: mom where the FUCK is my earring FLORA: does. it. luke. like. i. know. MDOSIEW: literally what MDOSIEW: K IM GOING TO LOOK IT IN THE BASEMENT FLORA: NO DONT MDOSIEW goes to the basement and suddenly he sees the wall is somehow open and leading to somewhere. FLORA: MDOSIEW if you go through that secret passagé i will disown you MDOSIEW: why the fuck do we even have a secret passage here... what are you hiding? FLORA: NADA SEU CARALHO DE MERDA VEM JÁ PARA AQUI ANTES QUE EU TE DÊ O MAIOR MURRO DA TUA VIDA. ANDA. PARA. AQUI. MDOSIEW: nope MDOSIEW goes through the secret passage, and he finds a door. He goes through the door and he sees... MDOSIEW: oh. my. cameron dallas. FLORA: im sorry mi niño MDOSIEW: mom what the fuck is th-- Flora knocks out MDOSIEW. FLORA: ...no. one. shall. know. PART 3/3 Tom is at Gundham's house. TOM: ok but seriously your beautiful hamsters are soooo skilled and cute GUNDHAM: YOU FOOL! THEY ARE DEMONS, DEMONS FROM THE UNDERWOR-- TOM: are they though? GUNDHAM: of course they-- TOM: You know... I once had an experience with a demon. It was when I killed my boyfriend. Ok it isn't what you think, let me explain. This demon... she. She was my friend. But she turned into this cruel monster. She sent her servants against me. The first time that happened, I was in the hospital. I had just been attacked by another demon and shit. But I wasn't in the hospital because I was hurt... It was because of... my boyfriend. He almost had been killed you know... Out of nowhere the demon's servants pop up and I have to escape from somewhere, but I could only escape through the window. I jumped right through but he bled out. I kept being chased by this demon for what... 2 more months? He almost killed my family. They're now in this island... Jabberwock Island? Yeah I believe that's the name. GUNDHAM: Wow... Um... I'm... I'm really sorry about that. TOM: its okay... so are you really a demon? GUNDHAM: I...um... no. but don't tell anyone! TOM: so... why? GUNDHAM: ...hmm? TOM: why this fantasy about being a demon? I mean I had my share of fantasies too that I was the fourth girl in Totally Spies and that I fucked all of Clover's men and then in the end betrayed all of them and killed them GUNDHAM: um TOM: but... why do you act like that? are you ashamed? of... something? GUNDHAM: I... don't really wanna talk about it. TOM: well... if you do, im here. Im a very good listener. GUNDHAM: It's not that, it's just... I've never talked to anyone... this way. Except my own mother. TOM: exactly gundham. you should be able to talk to someone... and who better than me? GUNDHAM: haha... i guess TOM: well, gundham... so... what do you wanna do now? GUNDHAM: i dont know. i mean... would you like to watch something? TOM: Oh... do you like Air Buds? GUNDHAM: lmao no TOM: but its puppies... how can you not love anything with puppies GUNDHAM: I guess I could teach you some tips about animals... TOM: omg really, my dog is a really huge bitch Gundham started teaching Tom about animal stuff and in the end Tom ended up sleeping over at his house. The same happened with Tracy and Link, as far as I know. And where was I at that moment? Brian and I were chilling out at a bench. We were just... talking about stuff. BRIAN: So yeah... I had this really messy breakup with my girlfriend... She was just... Really needy and she kept annoying me. In the end, I don't think it worked out and I don't think she ever loved me. I think it was the best for both of us. CLAIRE: Ugh, the same happened to me with my ex this year. Except this guy... fucked every last one of my friends at my college. BRIAN: Oh... yeah. My girlfriend also fucked a lot of dudes in exchange for stuff she wanted. CLAIRE: lmao this sounds like we're competing over whose ex is the douchiest BRIAN: true... lets talk about more happy stuff, shall we? What do you wanna do with your life? CLAIRE: ...Hmm? I wasn't expecting that to come out of his mouth. CLAIRE: I... I don't know. BRIAN: I guess you just wanna go with the flow, huh? CLAIRE: I don't... Really think about the future all that much. So I guess in a way, yeah. BRIAN: Same... Although one day I want to be settled down, have kids and scream my ass off to get them to wake up in a school day-- I interrupted him by laughing. BRIAN: Hehe... I just want to live for now. I still have a lot to learn about this world after all. CLAIRE: Hmm, I agree. BRIAN: It's getting a bit chilly up in here, isn't it? CLAIRE: Kind-- He instantly took off his coat and put it around me. BRIAN: Wanna come over to my place? I m-mean, not in a p-perverted way, in a... friendly way? CLAIRE: I'd love that. We went to his place and... we just hanged out there. Played games, commented about TV shows, we even high-fived and... then... BRIAN: So... It's already midnight... Your mom is probably waiting for you, right? CLAIRE: She probably fell asleep with her vibrator on, she's fine. BRIAN: ...umm CLAIRE: yep. a mom's got to mom you know. BRIAN: Heheh... heheheheehehehe I guess so. We chuckled. BRIAN: So you're saying... You don't wanna go home? CLAIRE: I want to stay here. It feels... right. BRIAN: ...huh? CLAIRE: I'm sorry, I was moving too fast, wasn't I? BRIAN: No... Not that at all. I guess I'm just... surprised. CLAIRE: Surprised? BRIAN: I'm not really the guy that girls wanna follow all the time. I mean everyone follows Link but he likes... more rounded girls, if you know what I mean. CLAIRE: oh... i did not expect that at all BRIAN: Yeah, well... I wanna be with you too, Claire. And in the next 30 seconds or so, we just stared at each other... I tried not to blush but it was inevitable. I could notice his eyes widen as my face got red. And then... We... kissed. And went to his bedroom. And madeout. He talked dirty to me. I talked dirty to him. Kinda embarrassing but it was still hot. He took off his shirt. I widened my eyes as he took off his jeans. I took off my top and jeans too. And for a moment... I thought of him. Spongebob. What he had done to me. The lying, the cheating... The manipulating... It was over. Everything was over. I didn't wanna get hurt but... I needed to move on. It's not like Brian is going to hurt me like he did... Right? I need to enjoy this. That's what everyone tells you to do, Claire. Enjoy it. Do it. Have fun with it. He means nothing to me now. In a way... I needed to do this. I needed to fuck Brian. And fuck him hard. BRIAN: Claire... You wanna do this? I... yes. I need to. CLAIRE: Give it to me, Brian. I can take it all. He chuckled. Everything was OK, Claire. Everything... was... OK. After all, I can take it. I can take it all. The next day however... I woke up to Brian's side. BRIAN: G'morning. CLAIRE: G'morning. I checked my phone. Lots of missed phonecalls from my mom. ...What? Suddenly the doorbell rang. I got up and dressed. BRIAN: I'll open it. CLAIRE: Oh, it's not that. I need to leave, my mom keeps calling me. I think something may have happened. BRIAN: Oh well... Stay safe. He kissed me in the forehead. "Were we going too fast?", I thought for a sec. "Well he likes it so...". We went downstairs and he answered the door. Suddenly, a flashy chick I had definetly seen from somewhere showed up in Brian's door. MUSUME: HEY BRYBRY! Missed me, I'm sure you did, didn't you? Because you still love me! BRIAN: ...Musume? What are you doing here? We're over, remember? Wait... Musume... She's his ex-girlfriend? MUSUME: Well I was totes NOT Facebook stalking you and checking out where you where and I totes did NOT see your pics to find out two girls were in your pics so I DID come here in my own free will and decided to stop by and introduce you to my hot new boyfriend. Yo, baby? The guy turned around and my whole world went upside down. I wanted to forget him so bad... WHY WAS HE THERE? CLAIRE: SPONGEBOB?! SPONGEBOB: CLAIRE? BRIAN: SPONGEBOB? SPONGEBOB: BRIAN?! MUSUME: MUSUME! NYAHAHAHAHAHAA LMAOOOOO And from that point forward, what seemed like a good vacay for the drama filled college life... Suddenly turned into a reunion. An ex reunion.Category:Brian & Claire: Volleylove Episodes